Journey to farmlife

MY HEART, MY HOME

CHAPTER THREE

17th March 2009

Today I went back into suburbia for a day out with the girls. I’m getting quite used to the peace and quiet out here now and am falling in love with it but I still enjoy a day off. Getting home this afternoon, I received a wonderful surprise in the form of three big kangaroo’s in the paddock by the bottom dam. They were quite large and just as curious to see me as I was to see them. I managed to snap a few photos but the closest they would let me was on the opposite side of the dam which was still a distance away. There they stood with there little arms and powerful legs watching and waiting to see what I would do. I expect the previous owners dogs kept them away, but now they have returned. My vegetable garden will have to be close to the house or it’s sure to be there dinner. Talking about veggie growing, I’m thinking of growing some pumpkins and beans as my first vegetables. Yay, no monkeys, like in South Africa to destroy them. I wonder what “pest” I’ll have to watch out for though?

The cows are doing a marvelous job of keeping the grass nice and short in the small paddock that they are in at the moment. Johnny politely moved them into another area tonight which is fenced off, to carry on munching there. I mean who needs a lawnmower when you have T-bone and Mince around???? They really are doing a remarkable job. They seem to like the long blades of grass up along side the fence which is wonderful. It is an awful job to cut there. The cows are so placid, they chew grass, flick there tails and lay down most of the day. What a life I tell you!! It’s a reminder of how good a slow pace of life can be.

Our neighbors on the other side were out walking their dog tonight and stopped off to chat. They were so impressed with all the hard work Johnny is doing. She asked me am I using Eveready batteries as Johnny never stops. We all laughed at that comment. We said goodbye and went back inside as it was getting quite dark. The mosquitos were coming out for dinner too. Johnny replaced the fly screen on Michaela’s window tonight. That’s another window done.

18th March 2009

This morning I just could not wake up on time. Perhaps it had something to do with going to bed at pumpkin hour??? So, I dragged myself out of my nice warm comfortable very soft bed and yawned my way to the kitchen to make the kids there lunches and get some caffeine in my body. It’s going to be a cooler day today by the looks outside. I said goodbye to the children and remembered suddenly that the chooks were still locked up and rushed down to let them out. They were patiently waiting at the door and very politely moved out to the grassed area to start pecking in the dirt. The cows are clearing the grass faster than it can grow. Boy they are real good grass cutters. I’m looking forward to letting them out into the large paddock soon. T- Bone came right up to me while I stood watching the chickens scratching around and gave me a good sniff. This was a first; I guess they are learning to trust me now. They are much more comfortable around me. I watched him put his long tongue around a tuff of grass and with a mighty yank removed the blades of grass in one foul swoop. A butcher bird came down to see what was going on and sat on the fence watching carefully for anything that he could eat. The birds are truly masters of opportunity.

20 March 2009

I finally made a decision about the curtains today. I found a wonderful shop with a very helpful assistant. She helped me decide on fabric and color. I wasn’t too sure on blinds or curtains and have been wrestling with the choice since we arrived hence the delay. Today I settled on some beautiful drops and a lovely rod to hang them on. I have to wait until next week Wednesday to get the second window drops as they were out of stock. It’s okay though, I’m just happy that I finally made a decision and have them in my sight. The house isn’t open and visible to the road which is just as well seeing that we haven’t put anything up on the windows yet – shocking! I know. I think it’s high time though that I put some up now. The end is in sight!

On the way home I saw a new stock supply store and of course could not just drive by. I ended up walking out with a very cute and fat little guinea pig for Michaela. I know I said we shouldn’t get another right now but if only you could have seen her face! She was calling out to me really…. She’s healthy, very timid though and not as friendly as Bug’s but she’ll settle down I’m sure. I saw the most adorable baby ducks too in this shop and had to tear myself away and leave. I dare not come home with baby ducks without consulting with the farmer! I told the shop owner I will be back on the weekend to collect these baby ducks so he better save them for me.

I’m convinced I was born to live with animals. They are part of my make up and I just love this part of farm life. I called the beagle breeder yesterday to get an update on our awaited pup. Three more weeks to go, before they have injections and then finally we can view them. More than likely it will be a male pup that we will get but that is good. All good things come to those who wait, I hear.

I tried with all patience’s to direct the cows out into the big paddock once I got home but stubbornness seems to part of there makeup! After making an array of different sounds and looking like a total idiot I gave up and left them to mow the grass around the washing line which they seems to find rather juicy. Johnny will just have to shovel the cow poo tonight – what a thought! Ah, farm life…..

Tonight Johnny started clearing the wood that has been stacked in the stable. We made a bonfire and burned some of the wood, not much but at least it’s a start. We can’t afford the fire to get too big, so will have to do a little each night until we are through. It was good to see some of the wood lying there, disappear into ash and smoke.

Michaela was so surprised to see the new addition when she got home and straight away christened her “Miss Alice”. Where she comes up with these names, I tell you! Well Miss Alice wasn’t too pleased to be yanked out of her sleep and placed in these strange hands, and so decided to sink her teeth into Michaela’s chubby little finger. Well, Miss Alice is lucky she didn’t land up on the floor. I’m not sure who got a bigger fright, the guinea pig or Micky. I calmed them both down and send Michaela off to the lounge to quietly get to know her new guinea pig once she has bound her finger with a band-aid. “Miss Alice” has behaved this evening and seems to have settled in her new home. No more bites I hope!

21 March 2009

Today is Saturday. Johnny took the day off work which I was delighted about. His internal clock just couldn’t keep him in bed past 5 o’clock which was rather annoying as I in turn couldn’t stay in bed past six on a Saturday morning. I pulled out my bread machine and Johnny and I baked a scrumptious loaf of homemade bread which was completely demolished by my hungry lions.

At ten to seven we set off to a house around the corner that had advertised it was having a secondhand sale. The items I was particularly interested in seeing were the tinny (a small boat) and trampoline. We arrived and immediately decided to take the tinny for a mere $200 – what a give away I think! I missed the very nice trampoline by a few minutes which was disappointing but at least we got a very good price for the tinny. We took it home and straight onto the dam. It was so much fun and a heap of exercise on the arms I might add. My co-ordination in check and off Michaela and I floated. First a little backwards and then forwards until I got the hang of the oars. It was great fun. We just need to get rid of the reeds now and it will be even better. After an exhausting but good row, we finally maneuvered the boat out and up the side of the dam.

I convinced Johnny beyond reasonable doubt that we had to go and get those adorable baby ducks. This was the beginning of the saddest part of farm life yet, even worse that Bugsy death. I’ll explain. We brought two fluffy yellow one day old ducks and one brown fluffy one home. We were so happy and they were running around settling in. It happened so quickly, I never had time to stop it or even imagine how an accident like this can happen. Michaela was in front and the little yellow chick ran behind her and she accidentally stepped back on him. I won’t give you the gory details but I will say my heart broke with sadness. Floodgates were opened and we were both heartbroken. We sobbed about the situation and grieved for the loss of the baby duck. How is it possible to feel such happiness and then such sadness in a matter of minutes? Gee, it was really hard to get over this.

After about an hour everybody had calmed down and the two remaining ducks were swimming in the make shift little dam (a bowl filled with water) quite happily. They were relaxed and oblivious to what had just happens. They are such beautiful creatures.

Jonathan’s friend arrived to spend the day in-between this event which was a good distraction for Michaela and me. The boys went off to the dam and Michaela followed suit taking her mind off the past. Johnny continued to work in the garden pruning again. This afternoon we took two loads to the tip and have a third piled high on the Ute ready to go first thing in the morning. Johnny made a perch today for the chooks to rest on at night and they love it by the looks of it. I’m still waiting patiently for my eggs to arrive. They do a lot of scratching and sitting but no laying I’m afraid. The cows are doing great, getting fatter by the day and have finally been moved out to the big paddock. Tonight Johnny coaxed them back into the smaller paddock with the special feed for calf’s which we bought. They followed Johnny like big puppy dogs. They let us touch them as they nuzzled at the grain. They are growing well.

I almost forgot to mention, we got another guinea pig for Jonathan too along with the ducks. Our family of animals is growing wonderfully. I still feel upset about the event today but for Michaela’s sake must try and not show it. I feel emotional drained and rather tired now. Although there was lots of excitement throughout the day, the death of the baby duck put a damper on everything else and I found it hard to enjoy much else after this. I think a good night’s slept and tomorrow will be better. Nothing lasts forever including this sadness. Looking over at the kitchen glass door and there I see my friend the green tree frog staring up at me. Goodnight Mr. Frog, goodnight.

22 March 2009

Mornings after have a way of washing the previous day’s sadness away to some degree. I think of the bible verse that says “The mercies of the Lord are new every morning”. Grateful that the day before was over, I started out preparing for a new day and new plans. Johnny was clearing, loading and making trips to the tip. He had discovered paving around the build in barbeque that was covered up with sand. Who know how long it’s been that way. Johnny also got onto the roof of the kennels and swept away all the dead leaves, cut back the overgrown trees and the result was stunning. The sun was able to shine through the trees breaking up the shade and it’s looked wonderful.

I got busy cleaning and preparing for a farewell lunch for a wonderful girl we had recently met. I picked a bunch of flowers from our garden again for the centre piece. As I walked around my garden cutting flowers it brought memories back of years ago at my Mom’s house in Mount Vernon. We used to walk around the garden cutting flowers for the table too. Mom always had an array of colorful blooms going. She loved her flower beds.

The afternoon was filled with conversation and lots of laughter as we went boat riding, grass diving and swinging. Okay, I’ll back up and explain the grass diving. Yes, I really meaning grass diving. Jonathan had been collecting the massive amounts of mowed grass and stacking it in a pile. The children had discovered that it was a great soft place to jump into. Nobody complained of itchiness after which was amazing and had lots of fun.

Last night Johnny decided to make a fire using all the grass cuttings. It burnt for what must have been an hour and now all that remains is ash from the mountain of grass before. It was lovely to watch the fire burn under a sky fill with stars. It was a beautiful evening.

23rd March 2009

Alas, those mornings when we were so warm that we had to wear very little is fast becoming a distant memory. This morning early, I woke up shivering and had to close the sliding glass door and turn off the fan. Looking outside the grass looked wet with dew and the mist hung low in the pasture. I suspect from here on, we will be piling the layers on instead of off. It is the beginning of winter and suddenly winter seems to stretch into eternity. I’m not ready yet and still want those long hot summery days for awhile. I pulled out my wooly jumper and Eskimo slippers and headed for the kitchen for a hot cuppa. The cows are waiting patiently at the gate to be let out into the big paddock, but they will just have to wait a little while longer as I am not going out there yet.

24th March 2009

Last night we got three rather large roosters. They seemed to take control of the hens the moment they were let out the box they came in. They are beautiful. Big and white with great big red crowns resting on their heads. They strut around proudly and the poor hens stay right out of there way.

Well today is Tuesday and that means day out. I’m off to do some errands and collect my last two curtains for my lounge. Michaela has to go back to the doctor too, she is still not well and has battled with a cough still. I’ve made an appointment at another doctor for a general check-up for my little/big man and his sister too.

We left the doctor with more antibiotics for Micky and drove through to drop the kids off at school. Hopefully she will shake this cold this time.

Okay, I’ve been home for about a half an hour and that dam rooster has not stopped crowing! He goes off every two to three minutes just like an alarm! I’m ready to put him in the oven. I called Johnny at work to vent my frustration and he didn’t help matter much with laughing his head off. He actually thinks this is funny. On a serious note, even though my neighbors are very far away, I’m thinking they are going to get annoyed too. Hmm…… I was thinking that baby chicks will be delightful but now I’m thinking maybe it might just be easier to just buy the babies instead. I do hope he settles down. A few times are okay but this is too much! The strange thing is the other two are quiet and don’t look aggressive at all.

An hour has passed now and Mr. loud mouth is calming, thank goodness for that. I think maybe he’s a bit unsettled after the stress of moving. Shame the poor thing and here I was talking about the pot! Hmm, it was good he couldn’t understand me.

Johnny got home awhile back and we walked down to see the Roosters and for me to point out the noisy one who had by this stage started up the din again. I walked up to him and he turned on me and pecked my foot really hard! I threw my shoe at him in anger – the silly thing. His days are numbered… LOL. He just put another nail in his coffin. Well, he wouldn’t be quiet so we put them in for the night a bit earlier than usual and all is quiet again at last. Silence is golden!!!

I reckon I’m going get a bruise on my foot from that silly bird.

25th March 2009

I was rudely awakened at four o’clock this morning by that silly rooster. It crowed non stop from then on and I was so irritated! I made up my mind that they were all going – either to the farm store or the pot! So after the children left for school I made my way down to the roosters and as quickly as I could put them into a box and straight into the car. I then made my way to the farm store. They were quite accommodating and said they would take them. I exited the shop so quickly in case the rooster started up again and they changed their minds. I laughed all the way home and could not believe my luck. Yes! They are gone. We will be able to sleep peacefully tomorrow morning with no disturbances.

I spent the latter part of the morning at a reading workshop at Michaela’s school which was good. I gained a fair amount of insight into techniques which will help Michaela. By 11 o’clock I was hiding my huge yawns behind my paper. I was so tired and that was thanks to you know who!

This evening Jonathan started up with his new rugby club. There are mostly New Zealand players in this club. He came home from practice tired and with scratches on his shoulders from the scrum machine, but happy none the less that the season has started again for him. As Johnny was playing taxis tonight, I was left to do the evening routine of rounding up the cows, feeding and locking up all the animals for the night. The ducks are doing so well. They have grown somewhat and aren’t so fragile anymore. I decided that they should graduate into their own enclosure tonight instead of being in with the chooks. I’m a bit worried they will get cold, but they have wood shavings to lie on and each other in a warm cardboard box so they should be okay. The chickens obediently waddled into the night pen and so all was under control with the animals.

I’m off to watch “Farmer wants a wife” and then to catch the sandman. Goodnight!

27th march 2009

Last night we worked on the next kitchen cupboard. I replaced the edging on the shelves during the course of the day so that Johnny only needed to put the hinges back and finish sealing off with the silicone. We finished that cupboard and it was a good feeling to be able to transfer some crockery into them. Now it looks like my cupboard. Sometimes I look at all the projects to be done in our house and it’s easy to become overwhelmed. Remembering all that has been accomplished helps a lot and makes it exciting to reach the next goal we set.

My bookshelf is up at last and today I will unpack my boxes filled with books. I have so many books and I cannot bring myself to let them go. I mean how can one toss out knowledge? The world book encyclopedias which cost so much back in SA have just sat like ornaments on the book shelf in Australia. With the constant availability of the internet at our fingertip, these books have become obsolete.

The mornings are fresh and cool. Each morning I think about the approaching winter, the warm fireplace and what life will be like in this home during the cold months?

The cows graze all day long and occasionally pause to look around and listen to different noises. They are putting on weight daily. Each morning they wait patiently by the paddock gate to be let out. Michaela enjoys doing this chore and I watch from a distance as she attends to the cows, chickens and ducks. My loyal farm hand!



28th March 2009

Another Saturday morning rolls around. This morning I woke to a soft pitter patter of raindrops on the roof. Looking outside the sun was shining but the sky was grey and ready to open up any minute. I sent Michaela to let the animals out quickly before the heavy rain started. The cows actually galloped out the gate and gave a quick kick in the air, almost as if they were excited about going out into the big paddock. They are strange creatures!

We got to see the first snake tonight. It was just a baby but looked like a brown snake. I will have to look up in my book to confirm. It wasn’t very big. What worries me is that Momma might be around somewhere???? Well, he/she is dead as a doorknob now and hopefully Momma, if around moves on out.

We had another wonderful evening with friends visiting the farm. Saying goodbye tonight, we looked up at the wide open sky. What a beautiful evening it was. The clouds that formed throughout the day had disappeared. I only wish I could capture that view in a painting or photo, and what an amazing one it would be. I have never seen such beautiful skies before.

I got an email from the local horse riding school to confirm Michaela is booked in for this Thursday after school. She is delighted! Things are slowing falling into place and routines are being established again – it’s a great feeling. Jonathan was supposed to play his first rugby game tomorrow but we’ve decided to give him some more time to practice first, hopefully by next week he will be ready.

The kids are watching “Happy Feet”, farmer John is in dreamland and I have just finished making jelly for the children tomorrow. I have unpacked all my plastic ware and am having so much fun re-discovering things. There have been boxes that I hadn’t unpacked from when we first arrived as I didn’t have any space. Well that problem is history now. Last night I made some strawberry yogurt and it turned out wonderfully. It’s Johnny’s birthday tomorrow – my husband turns 43. Hopefully I will wake earlier than him to make him a good breakfast in bed. It’s going to be hard as he’s usually up with the worms!

29th March 2009

Well, true to my word I woke bright and early to make my husband breakfast in bed. After presents were given and coffees were drunk, I headed to the shops and Johnny worked on fixing up the pump for the kennels which wasn’t working. He’s so handy this husband of mine! The wiper sniper packed up too during the course of the week and so he worked on fixing that too. He got the sniper working to finish the verge grass and then it decided to die again. Apparently, something to do with the carburetor??? So annoying, seeing it’s only two months old!! That’s another project for this coming week though.

During my shopping outing I found such a funny candle for Johnny’s cake. It read “over the hill, I’m too pooped to party”. I thought it would make him laugh.

After a nice lunch with friends, we went for a walk to see how the animals were doing. I speak so nicely to the chickens each day and ask for some eggs but am yet to see any. My guess is if and when they start to lay I probably won’t find them in time and they will go off before I see them! Hopefully this won’t happen but I’m bound to have a mishap or two as this is my first lot of chooks. I’ve subscribe to a “chicken keeping secrets” website and they post newsletters out every week. Hopefully I can pick up some nice tips here about chicken keeping. The ducks are the funniest creatures. They are outgrowing the makeshift “dam” so quickly and will soon need a bigger “dam.” They run in and out of the new water and then chase each other around and then repeat the whole process again, quacking loudly. They don’t like to be separated either and quack loudly if you pick the one up and start to walk away. Well that’s another weekend behind us.

30th March 2009

It’s Monday again. We had a very overcast morning this morning and even a dribble of rain. As I expected the rhythm of our days is starting to revolve around the small group of animals we now have. Johnny dipped the cows for various pests this evening. We are not to sure about the weight of the cows. The mix ratio of the dip varies and is decided by the weight of the cow. Now tell me, how does one weigh the cow – I’m thinking it has to be estimation. I suggested we ask the man across the way with the bulls, but Mr. Independent decided he would just try himself. It’s like walking on a tightrope with your eyes closed and hopefully your foot lands in the right place. So, the many roles we assume during the course of our farm experience just expanded to apprentices vets!!!! Johnny and I are really from pioneering stock.

I sprayed some more poison on the weeds that were sprouting again. Was it only last week Johnny had cleared this spot of weeds? It’s hard to imagine how fast they grow! The fire we lit to burn some branches, was amazingly still smoldering this evening. I love the smell of wood burning and it really adds to the ambience of farm life.

Moving on into the kitchen as the dusk grew darker and we could no longer work outside. My window sill is at long last covered with a coat of undercoat after first receiving another sanding. I have just the right curtain to put up in the window and am really excited to see the progress being made. Tomorrow I will start looking for a rod. I’m working on getting quotes for granite tops, and making headway there too. We did some more silicone sealing on the last area in the kitchen. I’ve got a love/hate relationship with that silicone. It is the messiest product around. Johnny fills the gap and leaves me to do the running in. Of course, nothing works better than your bare finger. It is messy. None the less it’s done and dusted!

31st March 2009

Today I have no motivation I’m afraid. My enthusiasm is lacking terribly. Everything seemed a chore to the highest degree. While cleaning the kitchen very begrudgingly, I glanced over to where I could usually see the chickens pecking in the ground and thought I could see them on the wrong side of the fence. Thinking my eyes were playing games on me, I went out to investigate. The chooks were on the wrong side of the fence and after chasing them around for awhile the one chicken made its way back through the fence and thus showing me the hole. A massive big hole, that I’m sure was not there before! How and who made it? Well I was exhausted now chasing those silly chooks so I plugged up the hole and made my way back inside.

This afternoon when Johnny arrived home I was filled with renewed energy much to my delight and straight after dinner we all got stuck into the garden. We finally started moving the great big pile of dried out branches that we had cut down many weeks ago. Iris had passed a comment, that she hoped we were going to burn that pile soon. Well that makes two of us Iris – it a thorn in my side too! We had to wait for the wood to dry out though. Only three trailer loads were transported to the bonfire area but at least it is a start. The fire was the fiercest we had made yet. The yellow flames of the fire licked the air with its tongue. The sky was filled with tiny lights being tossed into the atmosphere for a few seconds. When the dried out leaves fell into the fire it converted into the most amazing and scary site I’ve seen in a fire yet. This massive column of flames stretching up to the heavens, dead straight at some times, almost as if something invisible was pulling or sucking it up. Other times it danced in the air licking any way it pleased. The heat created from the fire was so intense you could not stand very close to it. The good part was that due to the dryness of the wood, the fire burned fiercely but was over quickly.

As it grew darker we headed back to the house. I laid out the protective material over the counters and Johnny sanded the joints in the wall and proceeded to paint the window sill at long last. I’ve settled on a small decorative frill for a curtain here as I don’t want to close off that beautiful view of the paddocks.

So while Johnny worked on the painting, Michaela and I sat on the kitchen floor building puzzles and keeping him company. So for a day that started off badly, it ended off rather nicely.

Ist April 2009

This morning I went down to open up for the cows and in their water trough was the largest cane toad I’ve seen yet. He was at the bottom of the bath at first and so I rushed back to get my camera. Take note of the glands behind his head. These are what store the poison. He sure is strange looking. I took so many shots of him he must have thought he was on the cat walk!!!!

My darling husband caught me out today with an April fool’s joke. He calls me up and says to me “Do you know why the black cow is so fat?” I thought about that and replied no. “It’s because it’s pregnant!” he says…… Well, that statement had me going. Suddenly I thought a baby calf so soon, how can that be and wasn’t the cow a steer????? While I was sorting this lot out in my head, he says “April fool’s.” Ha Ha Ha. He really had me going for awhile. The blokes at work had caught him out with the same thing.

Johnny had a safety meeting after work so that meant Mom was taxi tonight for Jonathan’s rugby training. We quickly attended to animals and then rushed off to get him there on time after spending the late afternoon moving some more of the branch pile to the back. It’s going to take awhile to get all of it burnt. Slowly but surely we will do it! Just as Johnny tells me all the time. How does one eat an elephant???? It’s one spoon at a time.

I’m feeling ill right now. I think I’m overtire from a few late nights. Its bath and snooze time for me.

2nd April 2009

I opened my eyes this morning to heavy rain. Did I have to get out of my warm bed? It was raining cats and dogs. I stuck my nose out the door to see my darling chickens had escaped the run again and were happily scratching on the wrong side of the fence! They could just stay there as I wasn’t going out in the rain just yet.

The rain continued to pelt down and the news reported some flash floods up the north coast. It’s supposed to ease off tomorrow or so. Well with the rain set in today that meant no fires, no washing, and no garden chores – what was I to do? Johnny came home early as their workshop was getting too much water coming in and so, we decided to go do some shopping at the local hardware.

Michaela’s horse riding was cancelled due to the arena being a pool of mud. She didn’t take to kindly to Mother Nature spoiling her plans and was in an instant bad mood. Earlier on today on our shopping spree, we had found a net which hangs from the ceiling to cover her at night – something like a mosquito net. She has wanted one of these for awhile so that lifted the sulk and all was forgotten.

This evening the ducks graduated into a new swimming hole – they are growing so fast (from a bottom of a budgie cage to the bottom of the cat cage – much bigger and deeper.) They love it. It’s so great to watch them enjoy the water. The stick their heads under and try to dive. I made the hens some soft roosting boxes too out of an old plastic cat cage that I found in the garden, filled it up with wood shavings and tried to coax them onto it. I’m hoping they will lay the eggs there in the mornings. They are unfortunately not interested in my makeshift boxes and didn’t pay too much attention in this direction. It’s so frustrating. Johnny says they better start laying soon, or they’ll be in the pot! The cows have spent the day in the rain and they look rather somber and sorry for themselves. Hopefully the sun will be out again tomorrow. I miss the sun although all the tanks have appreciated the fill. Even the tanks by the kennels are overflowing.

Tonight, because of the rain I’m sure, our temperature dropped considerable, 21˚ in fact. Now I know that’s not cold, but any reason to light our first fire in the fireplace is good enough for me. My eager son collected wood from the shed and successfully made our first fire inside. The flames warmed the house wonderfully. I look forward to using it more often in the future. We sure will need it.

3rd April 2009

The rain is still pelting down. I am so over this rain now. Nothing is drying on my indoor line, and to top off the situation I discovered I have two leaks in my roof. Glorious! As I look out the door this morning with a scowl on my face, I see one black hen has flown the coop again! The same one as yesterday. This is a hen of distinction. The other three are content to stay together, however she is not. She insists on being on the other side of the fence. Boundary issues I’d say. I decided to let her be. If she wanted to be alone and in the rain, she would get her way as I wasn’t up to chasing her again. I scouted from the porch and saw her through the day. She is well. So what if she is wandering!!!!

I’ve finally caught up with my household chores today but somehow the achievement hasn’t made a difference to my mood. I’m filled with a sense of overwhelming doubt again about how long it will take us to renovate this old farmhouse. Suddenly I find myself longing for busy malls, fast lifestyles, latest fashions and all life’s mod con’s – all the things I wanted to run away from a short while ago. It’s amazing how when things happen –i.e. a leaky roof, you almost get derailed from your goals. It’s like a huge wet blanket that falls onto you and it’s hard to stay focused. I know my mood is sure to change as it always does and my formal zeal will carry me on. Two years from now, I’ll look back on these entries and probably laugh at it all. My thoughts take me to the song that Annie sings. “The sun will come out tomorrow.” I know this is a very gloomy end to chapter three – sorry folks.